Category: Joke Board
Reasons why Cookie Dough is better than men
It's enjoyable hard or soft.
It makes a mess too, but it tastes better.
You always want to swallow.
It comes already protectively wrapped.
You can make it as large as you want.
It's easier to find in a grocery store.
You can put it away when you've had enough.
It won't complain if you chew on it.
It comes chocolate flavoured.
You won't get arrested if you eat it in public.
You don't have to change the sheets if you eat it in bed.
It won't wake you up because it's hard.
You don't have to find an excuse not to eat it.
It won't take up room in your bed.
You never have unwanted cookie dough chasing you around.
You know what the extra weight is from.
It is very pliable.
hahahaha!
Guys, we are going to have to think of reasons why cookie dough is better than women.
One thing that comes to mind is that cookie dough doesn't post sarcastic jokes, but I'm sure there are better reasons.
Help me out here guys.
Bob
well cookie doe doesn't bitch when you want to watch football!! and its cheaper to keep around
Hmm. Sarcastic jokes? I don't know anyone who posts sarcastic jokes, do you Leanne? Good list, and all true.
No matter the flavour, cookie dough is always easier on your bank account.
You are right Brian33, though I must admit it doesn't go too well with beer.
As far as post 4 goes, go get your own topic. This is guy talk here. Go make a list or something.
Think of the different shapes you can make with cookie dough. Plus, it's soft pliable, and can be warmed up in a heartbeat.
Bob
Cookie dough doesn't sag with time -- it actually gets more firm. *duck*
lol Kai! Two points!
I agree.
You don't have to pay child support to cookie dough.
Bob
Cookie dough never says no.
Just to make it clear, not all women "bitch when you want to watch football."
Cookie dough is better than men because it can actually satisfy...
most do. this is really funny I must say. cookie doe doesn't need diamonds to be apppreciate, and it doesn't take forever to get ready for a date. LOL
Brian, if you're dating cookie dough, you need help. LOL
Cookie dough doesn't snore when you're done with it.
But Becky snores.
LibraLady, you and Gemini go get your own topic. Henceforth, look at this topic kind of like the men's room (off limits). Of course, you could come in disguised as Senator Lary Craig from Idaho, but you have to know how to tap your toes.
Bob
p.s. cookie dough never gets a headache.
Hey now! I started this topic, so if anyone goes, it's the men.
With cookie dough, we don't have to fake . . . anything.
Beat it, slap it, pound on it... No matter how much you abuse it, it always stays sweet.
Thanks Wraith. I hereby make you an honorary woman.
Bob, Gemini is right. She started this board, and you hijacked it. Go away.
lol. No Becky. I was comparing cookie dough to you silly women. And while we're on the subject...
No matter how lumpy or out of shape it is, you still want to eat it.
Yuck! I personally only want in shape, non-lumpy, cookie dough.
It will never ask to put it's cold feet on you.
Okay Gemini, you did start this topic, so, you have a point, so you can stay and play with us guys. (Becky and friends, yall have to go find somewhere else to play). And Gemini, you have to do what we say, you have to be the patient in some games we might make up, or, maybe, the nurse. In other words, you are our slave. Are you sure you want to play? (Personally, I'm thinking of truth and dare).
Anyway guys, we have a responsibility here. We can't just use cookie dough for whatever purpose--and you guys have been coming up with some good ones--we have the responsibility to see that the cookie dough can be the best she can be.
If misused, the best a young virginous ball of cookie dough might become is a lump in cookie dough ice cream, a most unpromising prospect. Yuck!
However, if we nurture the sweet loveliness of this ball (uh, lump) of cookie dough, teaching it to respond to our tender administrations, we can unleash in her the ultimate in orgiastic pleasures. In other words, she can become a girl scout cookie.
Think of it guys. The sweet little lump of cookie dough that you nurtured so lovingly becoming a girl scout cookie: a samoa, a Tagalong, a Do-si-do or even a short bread. Isn't that a beautiful thought?
Of course if we carry this fantasy one step further, a girl scout cookie can wind up promoting girl scouts--girls--girls that become women. Oh my God, what have we wrought here?
Forget it.
All cookie dough should be destroyed before it develops boobs and the desire to go shopping.
Just my thoughts.
Bob
No becky have not dated cookie doe. as much trouble girls can be, I love them!! Just having a little fun.
Cookie dough doesn't talk bac, grow a beer belly or have size issues...it doesn't have to hear how good it is all the time either.
oh yeah and when it gets around other cookie dough, it doesn't feel the need to have a verbal pissing match.
Also, we don't have to dress up like naughty nurses or french maids to get cookie dough hard; we just have to pull it out of the freezer.
Cookie dough is still desireable, even if it's a bit flat in places.
After you get cookie dough all hot and bothered, it'll actually stay around to let you eat it.
Cookie dough doesn't contain four parts fish. *duck*
Even gender-confused cookie dough can get eaten by a straight man, nuts and all.
Cookie dough can get as deep as it wants to in a man without breaking social norm.
The only thing fake that cookie dough might bring to the table is its sweetness, and even then sometimes the fakery's so good, you don't really mind.
Cookie dough doesn't have to be talked into letting you eat it on the kitchen table.
It doesn't complain if you wanna share its charms with the buddies.
Oh, and here's one for Bob:
Cookie dough doesn't try to pass off a list as an actual joke. *duck*
Kai
Preciosa, those were hilarious. Thanks.
Wraith, you damn well better hide. I'm coming after you with a huge cookie dough roll to beat you with it.
Bob, get a life and get a grip!
Preciosa, Becky wouldn't know funny if it stared her in the face (oh, it does).
Raith, what are you, one of those girly guys (to quote the governor of California).
Becky, nothing wrong with the life I have. It just happens to have a lot of cookie dough in it right now.
Bob
Women always want to swallow cookie dough...actually, so do men.
cookie dough doesn't relentlessly try to pick you up; it just waits for you to pick it up.
Cookie dough doesn't ask for a credit card.
cookie dough doesn't say, not tonight I have a headache!
It's a good one. I was laughing when i was reading this post. Well, yes, sometimes cookie dough is better than men.
There's got to be an opposite to this post why cookie dough are better than women? Go for it, if you guys want to post.